Words of wisdom from Babu Uncle

Dear Baby and Puppy

What's wrong with the youth of today? There are such great opportunities available to you that were unheard of during our state socialist days. I have a few very good ideas :

1) Patent on Water:
F!@#ing, H2O yaar! Good old water. Hasn't been patented. We can earn money for every single drop of water running down the throat of every human being. Imagine how rich you will become. Please don't talk about poor people and all that commie shit. They can have coke if they think water is too expensive. In India we get coke for less than a few cents (American, of course).

2) Patent on Blood:
It's flowing in each one of us for free. It's high time all these free loading bastiges pay for every single drop of blood they are stealing from the creator whose rightful intellectual property it is. That will be us (if we file a patent soon enough). I hear Monsanto is already thinking of it. We have to make haste.

3) Privatization of Rivers:
The whole problem with river mismanagement and ensuing flooding and calamity is these bloody people aren't civilized enough to manage rivers. During British days, how come we didn't have all this nonsense? Our people need a hunter on their backs. I say privatize rivers. Give it to privately pwned corporations who will ensure safe and sustainable manufacture of water at the source and subsequent disciplined, planned and scheduled delivery across land to the ocean. Only Private corporations can hire talented MBAs who have the required skill and know how in Transportation Logistics and Supply Chain Management. Nature(TM) is useless and corrupt. It's no good. Enough of mismanaged rivers and red tape Nature(TM). Time to privatize rivers.

regards,
Col.Mrs. Amarinder"One Shot" Thapa. aka Babu Nair
1 800 ONESHOT
For, all problems in the world can be solved in one shot.