Tuesday, November 27, 2007

Ode To A Spider

Dear All,

In honour of our new "About Me", we present the following :

An Ode To A Spider - by Baby Vaijayanti and Puppy Manohar

Eat little spider eat while you can;
Eat the mosquito that I hold in my hand.
No dear human, that is not my will;
For I only eat that which I kill.

Tell me, dear spider, why should you hunt?
I've killed these insects with my tools, so blunt.
Come, dear spider, come to me; be my pet.
No, dear human, I've not been domesticated yet.

Spidy Spidy, all this just for you,
Although I'm sitting in the toilet and have nothing better to do.
Aren't you worried you will be extinct soon?
Not right now, dear human, only during the afternoon.

Do you want me to sing a song?
Why, my man, do you plan to be here long?
No thanks, actually, finish your job and go
And leave me to eat my mosquito.

Ha! Gotcha there! This one I have killed.
See, it's your ego - everyone wants their stomach filled.
What rubbish sense of pride you portray;
Behind my back you will eat it though it's not your prey.

Alas, dear human, this is where you're mistaken.
Only in your species, your pride you have forsaken.
Pride! Oh, we have plenty. And culture, you can't relate.
And please, I don't have to take lessons from an invertebrate.

Spiders have pride, too, you know.
Take that dead mosquito of yours, just go.
Don't sit there and stare and gape;
I don't need alms from a glorified ape.

Yes, but we have large brains and mouths, to chew.
You merely crawl around the web and search, (ah dhang you).
Besides, than you, I am a thousand times tall.
Shut up, or you see, that magazine will accidentally fall.

Such is the power of humans. And that is why we rule.
So you see children - Kill animals, Burn forests and Consume fuel.

Best Regards,

Baby V and Puppy M

"Only the good die young" - Iron Maiden


Shoonyata said...

ohhh, we rule? with bits of the mind nibbled at random by she who hangs from the webs that slowly covering the mind...not to kill but slowly decay...derange...to a virus injected computing contraption that kills the earth, starves the kids and so forth..while her hairy legs tickle us to a sense of bliss...:))

you guys are great !!! easily the best blog I have seen recently .

unpredictable said...

Randomness and brilliance doth a heady mix make (better than the 3 gulpies of Absolut childsize bottle anyway!)

Chinu-fish said...

Oh dear Spider,

Have your mosquito and go away to some garden tree, where you originally belong.

You are far more superior than humans (but not fish & dog). So, now are you happy? Yes..? Then please make haste.


Painkiller Underscore Overdose said...

brilliant...absolutely brilliant poetry.

Stupidosaur said...

Well, this is how an even superior glorified reptile feeds moquitos and succeeds (unlike glorified apes):

Capture the mosquito in the cavity of the claw, flick it into a spider's web. Mosquito's still flailing limbs draw the spider forth, and it hunts it thinking only itself responsible for the kill!