Monday, September 25, 2006

So much for Darwin

Dearest Puppy Manohar,

I am extremely sorry. Though Daddy in his infinite wisdom and articulate demeanor is writing this letter to you. I am sure he is penning down the feelings as they appear in my mind (i.e assuming that two year olds like me have feelings). I hope the tears in my eyes and my crying suffices to convince you that I am in fact really sorry. Although statistically speaking they mean I am hungry.

I can not express how sorry I am. I apologize profusely for having put you in the refrigerator. Me and Daddy were only doing an experiment. An experiment that we believe will bring you and your beastly brethren a higher place on this planet, currently ruled by Man (and woMan, of course). However, if you think our innovative plan for your emancipation would have killed you (like "Mom" here claims so emphatically) then Im sorry. Im really really sorry. Although, even if you would have died, you would have been a martyr like Laika.

But so that you do not grow up hating me for having tried to kill you, I would want to elucidate my rationale which was supported by my ever loving and supportive Dad. If theory of evolution is in fact correct then we thought we can actually put you through the exact same conditions that primitive mammals passed through to evolve in to a Man. There was a long ice age which caused lowly animals to evolve in to man (amd woMan, of course) We felt the best low expense way to recreate that environment was the good old refrigerator.

I believe, if Mom (who claims she loves you) would'nt have removed you prematurely, you would have certainly evolved a bit. Already, your stature, I can see has become a bit more erect than it was before.

Now if you will excuse me there is some one I would like to forgive, myself.

Baby Vaijayanthi.
"Please forgive me for loving you more than I should"- Bryan Adams


Avi said...

Dude this is hilarious !! Keep posting!! Looking forward to the evolution of aby vijayanthi and puppy manohar.

Swaminathans said...

Jhakaaaaaaas article man. Great going Sid...keep rocking and writing--Why not both?

green-eyed goblin said...

To me your baby vaijayanti has a lot of similarity to Anne Frank's way of writing.......btw..great post...

Anonymous said...

anne frank? oh great! and so folks, today's casual hitler comment is brought to you by panties-in-a-bunch-and-sand-in-my-vagina-shiv: wait until my jewish friends get a sniff of how irreverently you put down an iconic work with your fascist, hitler-loving schei├če of a comparison!